My Mum Shot Tony Blair

“Everyone just stop for a moment!” Minister for Good Ideas & Gin Dr Samantha Martens strode into the centre of the pantry, stern palm aloft and a determined expression on her face. “Thank god,” the Prime Minister whispered to Boris, King of Oxford. “She must’ve had a Good Idea.” “I’ll bet you a shiny farthing … More My Mum Shot Tony Blair

The Butler Did It?

“There’s no need to look so bloody smug, you curly haired bastard.” But the Chancellor was wasting his breath. The Cabinet Secretary’s default setting was smug and the unexpected turn of events this afternoon had given him good reason to be. “This will put an end to any idea of that ridiculous peace treaty,” mused … More The Butler Did It?

Charades

“Mumsie, the lies and deceit have gone on long enough,” the voice of Snetterton was hot and husky in her ear. “The truth will set us free, my darling.” “The only thing I want setting free is the catch on this bloody bra,” Mumsie replied, struggling in a most ungainly manner with the stubborn fastening … More Charades

The Art Of Distraction

Where do butlers go when they aren’t buttling? This is a question that has troubled mankind for centuries. Well, perhaps ‘troubled’ is going a bit far. ‘Mildly interested’ might be more appropriate. Also ‘mankind’ is rather broad. A few posh types might have considered it on occasion. But we must allow for some artistic license. … More The Art Of Distraction

Sir Edd & The Matter Of Truth

Wing Commander Tom found it troubling that nowhere in Number Ten proved secure enough to guarantee uninterrupted interrogating. Despite commanding the elite Cambridge Intelligence Agency – who were heavily although discreetly armed – there seemed to be no order or threat that could keep the rampaging parades of various ministers from interrupting his important work. … More Sir Edd & The Matter Of Truth